October 15, 2016
What does it mean to live, laugh, love?
I have always loved that phrase. I am reminded of the deeper meaning of these three little words today as I write. This past week was a hard one for me. A friend that I have known half my life committed suicide. She always appeared happy, and energetic and full of life. She was vibrant, beautiful and strong. So hearing of this tragic, senseless loss has done quite a number on my emotions. She left behind a husband, and three beautiful children, family members and so many friends that loved her. No one knew she was depressed. She hid it so well.
I revisit our last conversation and wish I had of asked different questions. I wish I had of been nosey and pushy and invasive. Maybe if I had of I could have helped? I let the conversation go in the direction it went, and I didn’t press for deeper answers, or really connect with her to see how she really was. Life is always so busy and we get caught up in the routine of our everyday. I didn’t make the time I should have in our friendship. I let the everyday routine of my life stand in the way. I reflect on this and have much regret. I wish I could just pick up the phone and tell her how special she is.
After much reflection, I have decided I have to accept this as a learning experience. I can’t change what happened, or even go back and re do the last conversation I had with her so I am choosing to learn from this tragedy.
I choose to live. To laugh, and to love with my whole being. I am determined to be of good mind, body and soul. I make it my mission to continue with this health journey. To make my body a vessel of whole food nutrition and my mind free of regret, worry and to let my soul shine and flourish.
I will be present in life. Not just going through the motions of everyday routine. I make it my mission to connect with the people I care about. To ask the important questions and to make sure my loved ones know I am always here if they need to talk or if they just need me to listen.
RIP Dear Jenny. You will never be forgotten. I will think of you with fond memories and I promise to Live, Laugh, Love every day for both of us.
Melissa
